I’ve been saying I’m going to write about this for weeks,
but the truth is,
I don’t know if I can
I don’t know how to make beautiful devastation.
See I hear “Lebanon”
I see red stripes and a cedar tree.
They tell me that 60 people were killed in a village outside of beirut,
I see Aunt Ragida
The first female pharmicist in the history of Lebanon
I see a woman who overcame so much,
broke free from tradition,
and followed her dreams,
I see myself in the mirror at three years old,
she’s in front of me,
wiping her make up off of my face,
laughing, joyous, loving.
They broadcast the score
I see Uncle Osmat,
the one I’ve spoken with my whole life,
the one I’ve never met because
he was fighting this battle the year I was born.
I hear his voice, “anuphebic, habiti”
He tells me his home is gone
I see her,
it’s 10:30, it’s been a long day, and all she can think about
is brushing her teeth
14 yrs old,
with a head full of dreams she can never chase,
hearts she’s will never break.,
knowledge she will never share,
in a bomb ridden slumber,
she’s no longer here.
I don’t want more people to die,
I don’t want devastation for my family,
I read about 100,00 people having no place to call home,
and I picture
5 adults, 6 children,
over a pharmacy.
The thing is,
there is no solution.
there is no hope
this war on terrorism has cost me my hope
my country is killing my people
and i am more helpless than i have ever been.
and what is war but
terrorism with a bigger budget?
I want to scream, shout, tear the roof off
but what’s the use?
My anger gets me nowhere but angry,
my hate won’t save my heriage
these are all emotions not worth feeling anyway,
because there is nothing i can do to save them
and bitching about it gets me nowhere.
i pray to Kali, Buddah, Christ, God, Nefertiti, Diana, Lakshmi, Thor, Zeus, Mohammed, Allah, Yaweh, I pray to the god in all of you,
I pray my family lives to see tomorrow,
I pray my cousins will be granted the luxury of life,
I pray my aunt becomes a grandmother,
I pray to God they get through this.
I want the world to see,
I want every executive, vp, banker, homeless, broken hearted, cynic, idealist, poet, artist, musician to see
that this isn’t some nameless, faceless fight,
this is life,
and it deserves better.